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Thread: My Gothic Son

  1. #61
    MattKing's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Truzi View Post
    By saying I'm over 25 I've not given an upper limit, so I may in fact be older than you (though I don't know how old you are). I am as old as my gums, but a little older than my teeth.
    By that, I think we can infer that your teeth are actually your teeth, and not something you put in a container at night.

    And as to your previous, long post, I think it is excellent.

    Although I would certainly recommend to people that they try temporary tatoos and clip on jewelry before they make any final decisions!
    Matt

    “Photography is a complex and fluid medium, and its many factors are not applied in simple sequence. Rather, the process may be likened to the art of the juggler in keeping many balls in the air at one time!”

    Ansel Adams, from the introduction to The Negative - The New Ansel Adams Photography Series / Book 2

  2. #62
    Truzi's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MattKing View Post
    By that, I think we can infer that your teeth are actually your teeth, and not something you put in a container at night.

    And as to your previous, long post, I think it is excellent.
    Thank you.

    I do put something dental in a container... in the day, though. I have a night-guard because I tend to grind my teeth in my sleep. I inherited that from my mother (the grinding, not the guard).
    My teeth are mine, even a few implants (I paid for them).
    Truzi

  3. #63

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    Quote Originally Posted by Truzi View Post
    Thank you.

    I do put something dental in a container... in the day, though. I have a night-guard because I tend to grind my teeth in my sleep. I inherited that from my mother (the grinding, not the guard).
    My teeth are mine, even a few implants (I paid for them).
    This means nothing, could just be your "adult" teeth that are older than your kid ones haha

    But perhaps you are older, as I am only 6 years older than 25.

    And I am still not sure if you are a boy or girl haha

    Its also possible you just had bad genetics or bad hygiene and could still be young. A friend of mine who is YOUNGER than 25 has "synthetic" teeth and takes them out at night... so that doesn't say much.

  4. #64
    Truzi's Avatar
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    The comment about gum and teeth is somewhat changed from A Miracle on 34th Street (I believe the movie used tongue instead of gums). No, I am not Mr. or Mrs. Claus.
    Truzi

  5. #65
    norm123's Avatar
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    My Gothic Son

    I'm sorry

    The picture in in the Standard Gallery.
    See for norm123 pictures

  6. #66
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    Quote Originally Posted by TheFlyingCamera View Post
    Tom1956 made a comment about sending kids like him to a farm to plow fields and chop wood for a couple years to straighten them out. I don't know the kid at all - his dad certainly didn't have any complaints, and felt proud enough of him to take his portrait and post it online - sounds like the kid doesn't need any straightening out. He just has a different fashion sense.
    He is a good kid. No needs to screw him. It's just an identity quest...normal for his age. He is not an angel....he is not evil...

  7. #67
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    Quote Originally Posted by TheFlyingCamera View Post
    I don't think it needs to be "straightened out". Leave the kid alone and let him be what he wants to be. If he doesn't like it five years from now (highly likely) he'll change. And like most people who change between 15 and 21, by the time he's 25 he'll probably regret some of the choices he made vis-a-vis body modification, or even just fashion statements that are now commemorated forevermore in dad's photos. But the surest route to destroying a relationship between a parent and child is to try and force "your" way on them (and that goes both directions, not just parents trying to make kids be what they want them to be instead of what the kid wants to be). I'm not saying never say NO to the kid, but don't drop ultimatums on them. Do that when it doesn't count, and when it does, they'll choose the option you don't want them to.
    The mother of the Gothic son and wife of the photographer here...

    My husband being a francophone asked me to read all these comments to help him understand. This is were I'm stopping because finally something that we could relate to.

    So glad you get it! Our son does not need straightening out or to go to a farm and he is not suffering more than any one else. He is simply experimenting and developing his identity. As you say, most people change between 15 and 21. We've explained to him that he should not go with piercing or tattoos until he is older, as they might limit his career choices and/or he might simply change and regret his choices.

    Again as you say, we do not want to destroy our wonderful relationship with our son. We are letting him be who he wants to be. (sometime difficult for a parent...). This being said, we say NO an a regular basis. Being what you want to be does not mean doing all that you want, especially not at 14 years old.

    We live in a very multicultural environment, Montreal/Laval, Québec. "Normal" or "standart" here, as many meaning as people come from all over the world and have many different religious backgrounds. Some families, like in the past, are happy and some are less. Some have problems and some are dysfunctional. We are teaching our son to express himself while keeping his values in mind and while respecting those of others. Until he will be an adult, we hope that he will keep changing "style" and exploring options. Hopefully, he will make choices (with our guidance) that will keep him safe and healthy. He is growing up exposed to different cultures - and to all types of music-. So, regardless of the labels that we give, we hope that we will be able to be graceful towards people that will judge him based on his appearance.

    Now, can we go back to the portrait? And stay tuned. Our son might look very different in six months from now...

  8. #68
    norm123's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by norm123 View Post
    He is a good kid. No needs to screw him. It's just an identity quest...normal for his age. He is not an angel....he is not evil...
    Wife of Norm, mother of Goth son... My husband is francophone. He meant no "Need to fix him- to thighten the bolt".

  9. #69

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    Quote Originally Posted by norm123 View Post
    The mother of the Gothic son and wife of the photographer here...

    My husband being a francophone asked me to read all these comments to help him understand. This is were I'm stopping because finally something that we could relate to.

    So glad you get it! Our son does not need straightening out or to go to a farm and he is not suffering more than any one else. He is simply experimenting and developing his identity. As you say, most people change between 15 and 21. We've explained to him that he should not go with piercing or tattoos until he is older, as they might limit his career choices and/or he might simply change and regret his choices.

    Again as you say, we do not want to destroy our wonderful relationship with our son. We are letting him be who he wants to be. (sometime difficult for a parent...). This being said, we say NO an a regular basis. Being what you want to be does not mean doing all that you want, especially not at 14 years old.

    We live in a very multicultural environment, Montreal/Laval, Québec. "Normal" or "standart" here, as many meaning as people come from all over the world and have many different religious backgrounds. Some families, like in the past, are happy and some are less. Some have problems and some are dysfunctional. We are teaching our son to express himself while keeping his values in mind and while respecting those of others. Until he will be an adult, we hope that he will keep changing "style" and exploring options. Hopefully, he will make choices (with our guidance) that will keep him safe and healthy. He is growing up exposed to different cultures - and to all types of music-. So, regardless of the labels that we give, we hope that we will be able to be graceful towards people that will judge him based on his appearance.

    Now, can we go back to the portrait? And stay tuned. Our son might look very different in six months from now...


    The only thing I want to know is which subculture he personally identifies as. But that's not really important, just a curiosity if HE says he is goth or something else.

  10. #70
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    Quote Originally Posted by StoneNYC View Post


    The only thing I want to know is which subculture he personally identifies as. But that's not really important, just a curiosity if HE says he is goth or something else.
    He says "a bit of everything, mom...". It's his dad that called him a goth. He says he is "a live and let live". And he grew up a blond clean cut boy. Today, our "dark" looking son comes to Blues festivals with us, comes to the opera with me, listens to folk with his French uncle, and enjoys jazz and classic rock. (grunge too-Nirvana) So really, I understand that he does not want to identify with only one group, typical of our son.



 

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