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Thread: My Gothic Son

  1. #71

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    Quote Originally Posted by norm123 View Post
    He is a good kid. No needs to screw him. It's just an identity quest...normal for his age. He is not an angel....he is not evil...
    Wife of Norm, mother of Goth son... My husband is francophone. He meant no "Need to fix him- to thighten the bolt".

  2. #72
    StoneNYC's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by norm123 View Post
    The mother of the Gothic son and wife of the photographer here...

    My husband being a francophone asked me to read all these comments to help him understand. This is were I'm stopping because finally something that we could relate to.

    So glad you get it! Our son does not need straightening out or to go to a farm and he is not suffering more than any one else. He is simply experimenting and developing his identity. As you say, most people change between 15 and 21. We've explained to him that he should not go with piercing or tattoos until he is older, as they might limit his career choices and/or he might simply change and regret his choices.

    Again as you say, we do not want to destroy our wonderful relationship with our son. We are letting him be who he wants to be. (sometime difficult for a parent...). This being said, we say NO an a regular basis. Being what you want to be does not mean doing all that you want, especially not at 14 years old.

    We live in a very multicultural environment, Montreal/Laval, Québec. "Normal" or "standart" here, as many meaning as people come from all over the world and have many different religious backgrounds. Some families, like in the past, are happy and some are less. Some have problems and some are dysfunctional. We are teaching our son to express himself while keeping his values in mind and while respecting those of others. Until he will be an adult, we hope that he will keep changing "style" and exploring options. Hopefully, he will make choices (with our guidance) that will keep him safe and healthy. He is growing up exposed to different cultures - and to all types of music-. So, regardless of the labels that we give, we hope that we will be able to be graceful towards people that will judge him based on his appearance.

    Now, can we go back to the portrait? And stay tuned. Our son might look very different in six months from now...


    The only thing I want to know is which subculture he personally identifies as. But that's not really important, just a curiosity if HE says he is goth or something else.
    ~Stone | "...of course, that's just my opinion. I could be wrong." ~Dennis Miller

  3. #73

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    Quote Originally Posted by StoneNYC View Post


    The only thing I want to know is which subculture he personally identifies as. But that's not really important, just a curiosity if HE says he is goth or something else.
    He says "a bit of everything, mom...". It's his dad that called him a goth. He says he is "a live and let live". And he grew up a blond clean cut boy. Today, our "dark" looking son comes to Blues festivals with us, comes to the opera with me, listens to folk with his French uncle, and enjoys jazz and classic rock. (grunge too-Nirvana) So really, I understand that he does not want to identify with only one group, typical of our son.

  4. #74
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    Quote Originally Posted by norm123 View Post
    ...we do not want to destroy our wonderful relationship with our son. We are letting him be who he wants to be. (sometime difficult for a parent...). This being said, we say NO an a regular basis. Being what you want to be does not mean doing all that you want, especially not at 14 years old.
    You sound like wonderful parents. He's a lucky kid.

  5. #75

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    Quote Originally Posted by eddie View Post
    You sound like wonderful parents. He's a lucky kid.
    Thanks. Not always easy but we try...

  6. #76
    Sirius Glass's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by norm123 View Post
    The mother of the Gothic son and wife of the photographer here...
    You and your family have it right. Keep doing what you are doing.

    The only ones that "need fixin' " are the dunderheads posting that "your son needs fixin' ". The dunderheads are the ones with the emotional and social problems. They are the ones who were brainwashed with less than half a thimble of water into their political and religious dogma that they are unable to emotionally or logically deal with anyone that disagrees with them. The world would be greatly improved if the dunderheads were euthanized.
    Warning!! Handling a Hasselblad can be harmful to your financial well being!

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  7. #77
    Richard Sintchak (rich815)'s Avatar
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    My Gothic Son

    Quote Originally Posted by Sirius Glass View Post
    You and your family have it right. Keep doing what you are doing.

    The only ones that "need fixin' " are the dunderheads posting that "your son needs fixin' ". The dunderheads are the ones with the emotional and social problems.
    +1

    :-)
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  8. #78
    StoneNYC's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by norm123 View Post
    He says "a bit of everything, mom...". It's his dad that called him a goth. He says he is "a live and let live". And he grew up a blond clean cut boy. Today, our "dark" looking son comes to Blues festivals with us, comes to the opera with me, listens to folk with his French uncle, and enjoys jazz and classic rock. (grunge too-Nirvana) So really, I understand that he does not want to identify with only one group, typical of our son.
    Sounds like a pretty cool kid! Good job!
    ~Stone | "...of course, that's just my opinion. I could be wrong." ~Dennis Miller

  9. #79
    StoneNYC's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sirius Glass View Post
    You and your family have it right. Keep doing what you are doing.

    The only ones that "need fixin' " are the dunderheads posting that "your son needs fixin' ". The dunderheads are the ones with the emotional and social problems. They are the ones who were brainwashed with less than half a thimble of water into their political and religious dogma that they are unable to emotionally or logically deal with anyone that disagrees with them. The world would be greatly improved if the dunderheads were euthanized.
    Just be careful with that last part... Despite wishing those types of people didn't exist, there's another person I can think of who thought that a certain group should be euthanized based on his personal beliefs too, and that didn't turn out well...
    ~Stone | "...of course, that's just my opinion. I could be wrong." ~Dennis Miller

  10. #80

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    Quote Originally Posted by StoneNYC View Post
    Just be careful with that last part... Despite wishing those types of people didn't exist, there's another person I can think of who thought that a certain group should be euthanized based on his personal beliefs too, and that didn't turn out well...
    its the story of humanity, if it wasn't the person you are thinking about,
    it was the person 20 or 30 years before him, and if not him, the person 20 years before him ...

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