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  1. #1

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    New Hope for BLIND Photographers!

    Now there is new hope for blind photographers!

    I am working on a fully articulated robotic digital view camera, complete with algorithisms that has nearly every masterwork by virtually every famous photographer in its database. GPS, real time monitor. Auto perspective, auto movements (focus), and naturally, auto exposure. If you are a sighted photographer, you can turn the camera on and send it out to shoot, looking through the remote on your computer screen and compose yourself. For the unsighted, simply turn on the camera in auto mode, and let the camera utilize the algorithisms to make its own images. It comes complete with a bad picture alert (which right now sounds like a truck backing up).

    If working in the monitored mode, it also has an uplink to the copyright office in DC and can let you lnow if you are close to infringement. (Four different warnings can appear. #1 Close but OK #2 getting dangerously close to another image #3 lawsuit being prepared right now #4 why don't you just scan (insert famous photographers name here_________) image and put your name on it?"))

    If you admire John Sextons work, Just program "mode Sexton" and it will provide images in the Sexton style. Or if you prefer abstact, just hit "mode Siskind". Of course all "the majors" have their own mode, Ansel, Wyn Bullock etc. (caution is urged for children when using the "mode Meatyard" as they may find the images may be frightening and "mode Mapplethorpe" comes with a standard decency warning indicating that the results may be objectionable to some)

    Now the unsighted or the "sighted challenged" can make images as good as Muench, Dykinga, or Sextion. Simply enter the desired location on the GPS, hit the power switch and go back to sleep! All from the comfort of your resort hotel room.

    This unique view camera will not be offered in any of the usual photography markets; it will only be retailed through the Sharper Image. Orders being taken now!!

  2. #2
    scootermm's Avatar
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    part of me really doesnt find this amusing or funny.


    [SIZE=2]perhaps its the part of me thats knows Im losing my job...[/SIZE]

    bc another part of me does find it funny.

  3. #3
    bmac's Avatar
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    shouldn't this be in "the lounge"? Or better yet, still in your head...
    hi!

  4. #4

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    That was funny! Could you possibly design something that would take my place at work so I can go out and shoot. Hell while your at it how about a Honey Do robot.
    Technological society has succeeded in multiplying the opportunities for pleasure, but it has great difficulty in generating joy. Pope Paul VI

    So, I think the "greats" were true to their visions, once their visions no longer sucked. Ralph Barker 12/2004

  5. #5
    Cheryl Jacobs's Avatar
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    Well, call me what you like, but I found it hilarious. Yeah, should probably be in the Lounge, but still.... funny is funny.

  6. #6
    KenM's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bmac
    shouldn't this be in "the lounge"? Or better yet, still in your head...
    Cheers!

    -klm.

  7. #7
    Aggie's Avatar
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    sad thing is, I could see someone making it for real. I too found it funny.

  8. #8
    bmac's Avatar
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    Don't get me wrong, I find it funny too. But I think it should be in the lounge, not in the LF section. The lounge is set up for jokes, off topic threads, and things that don't fit in with the main content of the site. This thread meets all three criteria.
    hi!

  9. #9
    juan's Avatar
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    I could just hear some of the folks in my camera club getting excited about it.
    juan

  10. #10

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    couple of questions for you since you are making the camera ...

    will it "gang register" images with the copyright office ?
    will there be a "cheesy - velvet painting mode"?
    lastly, will the resolution of the final image compare to the R-14 (?), you know that digital camera that guy made because he didn't realize you could get film in ULF sizes.

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