Some of my horror stories.
Early on in my career when I was shooting weddings, I went first to the bride’s home and was doing some shots and when changing lenses, I got my Hasselblad out of sync and the lens would not come off. If you own a Hasselblad you know what I mean. So I had to shoot the rest of the entire wedding with a wide angle lens. I decided to make the most of it and did a very arty wedding.
On another wedding I went to the Sunday wedding, after having done a Saturday one as well. I had too many drinks on an empty stomach Saturday night and on the Sunday while photographing in a very hot church, I was walking from the side of the altar through the side doors so I could take some shots from the behind the minister showing the bride and groom, as well as the crowd. Remember this is during the ceremony. Inside this little room that sometimes the register is signed, and is sometimes sort of a storage room they had those long folding table stacked against the wall. There must have been about 8 of them. I started to feel kind of dizzy and put my hand on the edge of the tables to steady myself and the first one slid out and hit the floor. Then the next and the next. BANG. BANG, BANG, BANG, All eight hit the floor. If you’ve seen the commercial “Wanna get away”. You know what I mean. So I went. Oh shit. I walked around to where I was going in the first place and everyone was staring at me. I mouthed “sorry”. And things continued. God that was awful.
Another time the lab ruined half a wedding, about 9 rolls. Luckily I overshoot and I salvaged it and nobody was the wiser.
I’m very anal about constantly checking the lens for f stops etc. If I screw up I usually later catch it, I merely tell the sitter, ‘ya know, I wanna do some of those early ones again. They don’t know the difference and my ass is saved.
When I do kids (90% of my work is kids), there is a lot of luck involved. I will always redo sittings if there is not at least one great shot there. One that I can hang on my wall or display places around town. I was doing a sitting of three kids. 2, 4 and 7. I did them individually and they were pretty cool pictures but I couldn’t get the 2 year old to do the right things or at the same times as the other two in the group shots. So we reshot, a week later. Same thing. The third time was not working too well either and so I handed him my 25 foot cable release on my Hasselblad and said when your ready, you take the pictures. He thought that was pretty cool making the lites flash and we lucked out and got about 5 good ones.
To make a short story long, everybody screws up. It’s what you do about it.
Last edited by blansky; 05-23-2005 at 02:12 PM. Click to view previous post history.
I couldn't think of anything witty to say so I left this blank.
Some of my favourite mistakes,
Switching to partial metering, then forgetting to switch back to matrix.
Shooting colour with a yellow filter.
Doing a portrait shoot with no film in the camera.
Not having the flash correctly seated on the hot shoe and not noticing it ain't firing for a good few frames.
Rating one roll at 320asa, then shooting the next at 400asa.
Setting exposure comp for a few frames, then forgetting about it for another good few frames.
Always thinking of great shots I could have set up after the shoot.
Dropping the dry roll of film in the bath when taking it down (aaaagh I hate that one)
Forgetting to set the lens back to f11 ater focusing the enlarger.
Pressing focus instead of the timer on the enlarger timer.
Knocking over the old projection screen at the end of the darkroom as I fumble for the light switch after loading film reels, then fumbling about trying to catch it and failing. This was followed by a loud crash as it collided with my old Nova processor, and in turn by the sound of running water (aaaaaagh ****** **** ****!)
Stupid motorcycling mistakes,
Forgetting to take the disc lock off, and as a result making a total arse of myself in front of a bevvy of pretty young girls as I try to pull away in style on my bike bike.
Putting my foot down in a puddle at junction in the pouring rain, only to discover it's a big pot hole (aaaaaaaaaagh **** **** Och!)
Having the police video car follow me for over two miles at excessive speed on a country road, hey my bikes got crap mirrors.
And the best one I heard of from a friend of mine. His mate parked his bike up in the street, flipped the side stand out and leaned it over. It then disappeared (the side stand) down one of those big old drain covers with the big gaps between the bars. That one took a wee while to resolve so I'm told.
Ach, the wee things sent to try us.
Thank you all for the replies - and the chuckles (which was the direction I had hoped this thread would go)
I've just motivated myself into mounting my last two lenses on boards and hopefully we'll see what the sun looks like again soon and I'll go a do a few retakes.
It's not soooo bad you know - a retake involves a drive in the country with my sweetheart, a cup of coffee and a chocolate chip muffin - all of my favourite things
Thought of another one - On a bike touring / photography holiday in Wiltshire I'm pouring over maps in the B&B one evening when I hear... ...a gunfight?! I dash outside and see fireworks lighting up the horizon. I dash back inside, grab the camera, open the back to put in a new film and then remember that I didn't bother rewinding the old film when I finished my roadside shots earlier in the day...!
Boy I forgot that one. I've done it too. Some school girls were sitting on my back wall overlooking my house. I asked em nicely to shift. I got dogs abuse back. So after letting em know that one way or another that I would get em shifted, I went back in the house to make a cup of tea, I was just in from work.
Originally Posted by FrankB
Over the other side of that wall was a derelict pub. They started smashing stuff up. I tried to ingore it, but then several small stones hit my window.
**** it I thought, and ran up the stairs to grab my camera.
Now I had just got back from France a few days before and had not sorted out my films yet, nor, as I was about to discover, had I taken the final one out of the camera. I grabbed a camera and a roll of colour neg, opened the camera back...............huh?.................what the...........****, ****, ****! Aaaaaaaaaagh!
Anyway the girls saw the lens after half a roll of decent shots from the upstairs window. Never saw them again. Well except one.............
Some months later I get stopped by one of the young girls mother's down the main street in the town. She was with her daughter. She ask me if I had been taken pictures of her daughter. I looked at her daughter, and said yes I do beleive I have. I patiently tried to explain. She told me that it was illegal for me to take pictures of young girls without permission. Again I patiently explained that her daughter was involved in an act of vandalism, had thrown stones at my window and told me to 'go **** myself' several times.
She then told me she was going to the police, and that she would have me charged. At this point I told her that I still had the pictures, and that she was free to go to the police, that was, as I told her, you don't mind making a complete ******* **** of yourself.
Chirst some people!
But what really did bug me, was that I was sure one of the best shots of my trip, if not the best, was on that last roll the one left in the camera. Doh, doh, doh.
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The one that still gives me nightmares is taking the Pentax LX out for it's first real outing to cover a pancake race sponsored and competed in by all the local stores. One really great shot was everyone skidding and falling over on the wet cobble stones. When I got to frame 38 I thought no way, at frame 39 I pulled open the back swearing to myself. Well I had almost loaded the film but I hadn't given it enough leader and the film was still happily sitting at the start. Happily for me it was so wet that there were other fun moments to capture.
This has never happened to me. I am ashamed of you! You are definately not a photographer and will need to send that illused and abused 8x10 my direction.......
Originally Posted by John Bartley
You can say you are not a photographer when you go home, process five sheets of film and realize nothing is on them. Then you realize that you did not process the exposed sheets just the ones you did not expose. That is a stupid mistake....um...I never did that either.
Technological society has succeeded in multiplying the opportunities for pleasure, but it has great difficulty in generating joy. Pope Paul VI
So, I think the "greats" were true to their visions, once their visions no longer sucked. Ralph Barker 12/2004
Just as well it wasn't a roll of Patterson, you get 39 shots with 35mm on them. I'm sure you felt really bad, but I'm just pointing out it could have been even worse, well sort of.
Originally Posted by TPPhotog
In a way it was bad enough as I was shooting this new fangled colour stuff, I hate shooting colour unless it's nature stuff
Originally Posted by gareth harper
[COLOR=DarkRed]You can say you are not a photographer when you go home, process five sheets of film and realize nothing is on them.[/COLOR]
I did do a press conference once. I did it as a favour/to support a well known Glasgow charity. The TV guys were there, the press, loads of pro snappers etc etc. I shot about 5 rolls, probably I was a little trigger happy and nervous, plus all those other cameras going click, click, click, flash, flash, flash,.......hey you have to try and keep up, look the part (ha ha).
Anyway, one roll I got back from the lab had 5 frames on it, then nothing, absolutely nothing. I've no idea. I still can't figure it out.
Who the heck started this?
You've reminded me of almost all the mistakes I've ever made. I'm getting depressed, maybe I should chuck it. Look at that lot, I'm useless, a failure. Who am I kidding? Artist? Photographer? Plonker maybe.....
At least Mark figured out what he did. I still ain't worked out what happened to that roll.