I would like to borrow your wife to receive the same benefits, when you get one, if you don't mind.
When I was temporarily based in New York, in 1995-96, I used a place in Manhattan, 17th St, called Photographics Unlimited. It had good darkrooms for rent, very reasonable prices. The community feeling was good, and creativity infectious. It has closed by now, I suspect, but if you are lucky to be living in one of those special cities on the planet where one can find everything, any time, you should easily find a place to swallow the wet printing (and Se toning) bug.
Anyway, apologies for desperately trying to turn you back from your journey straight to DPUG.