Point is, I know this camera pretty well, and I'm pretty sure I'm not doing anything wrong.
You're not. As mentioned, the meter is simply reading the sky and that makes everything else dark. Even very, very expensive cameras can cock-up in this way occasionally. Set the ASA dial on the front to a lower speed e.g. if your shooting at 400 asa, set the speed on the camera to 200 or 160 ASA. This will increase the exposure for the darker foreground (although it will blow out the sky).
Norman is an island.Time and tide wait for Norman.