Stevie Wonder, where have you been!? You should come out and play on an APUG outing (though unfortunately at this stage I'm going to miss the next one...)
If your nous is up to post-grad or Masters level you could land a job as a Lecturer at such luminous digs as RMIT or Melbourne Uni (though that place would seem unlikely in reflection). I reckon retail service in a chain would be the way to go e.g. Camera Action...VanBar Michaels ? (eek, quelle horreur!! ).

I hope you can merrily leapfrog over your troubles; there are a few going around in Geelong...