Try using a projection print scale
With a piece of 4x5 (maybe smaller) paper you will get very close to the final exposure, then from there you can fine tune.

re enlarging meter, here is an article to read

You could use a normal light meter, but you have to know how to use it for enlarging use. w/o an enlarging attachment it would be difficult.

I use a Unicolor enlarging meter like this one:
This one from Ilford will do.
With all enlarging meters, you still have to calibrate it by printing a "good" print first, then calibrate the meter to that print.
And you have to learn how to use it to its best potential.