"Unfortunately a couple of years ago, I had to get progressive lenses in my glasses. This I'm told is due to advancing age, whatever the hell that means. Or I could be due to too much masturbation as a kid. We'll never know."
Michael, If it were bifocals then I would say that the cause is advancing age ...but with trifocals, I am not entirely sure. I am at the bifocal stage...perhaps your libido is more attenuated then mine.