Before attempting this, be sure to watch this video by a fellow APUG member--

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vwfRA615Mx8

I suppose that if you wanted to get really sexy-crude, you could work something around the slogan used by the U.S. National Pork Board in its advertising campaigns--"Pork. The Other White Meat"--

http://www.theotherwhitemeat.com/

Have you ever roasted a filet mignon wrapped in bacon and tied? I see possibilities here...