I rather like this! It has a barren, skeletal end-game feel to it. But I won't say anything more, as I'm hoping to do a short paragraph or two write-up on each submission at the end.
Interesting you should mention first ideas. Whenever I do these sorts of exercises I try to routinely throw out the first half dozen ideas that pop into my head, figuring these are likely the same ideas everyone else also had pop into theirs. Then I start the real thinking, which at that point becomes much more rewarding for me.
Thanks for the submission,
Ken

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